"I've.. heard of it, yes," brow furrowed as she tries to think of just where she's heard of Kinloch Holdβshe's read so many history books, the events and names start to blur together if she's not careful. Okay, hang on, she can figure this outβtwenty years ago makes it...
"During the Fifth Blight, if I'm not mistaken? The Hero of Fereldan conscripted the mages of Kinloch Hold to help fight the Archdemon."
That's clearly not the whole of the story here, nor what Julius is entirely referring to, but it's all that was meaningfully covered in A Study of the Fifth Blight. Recent history was less of Ness's focus at first, so she hasn't spent as much time seeking out more information on the Fifth Blight as she has the Firstβit was either more ancient history or current events, during her initial studying.
"Yes, that's right." He is going to have to explain, to give context to his reaction, and he certainly doesn't give the impression of being eager to do so. That said, he goes on calmly enough.
"I was there. Well. Not for Uldred's Rebellion itself; I was one of a few mages who'd been pulled out for discussions about the Blight, after Ostagar. But I saw the aftermath when we returned." He pauses, deciding on his words "Uldred had been a senior enchanter. I don't know that I need to explain the full politics of what led up to the incident, really, but Uldred attempted a coup against the Circle's leadership. He summoned a Pride demon, lost control, and was possessed by it. He then tempted or coerced some of the other mages into using blood magic or becoming abominations, or first one and then the other. Between those who succumbed to using dark magic and those who died resisting them, it was..."
He stops for a moment, glancing away. Finally, he says, "Cousland and his allies managed to stop Uldred and get the situation sufficiently controlled that Kinloch Hold was not annulled outright, though I understand it was a close thing. Those of us in shape to do so supported Cousland in the fight against the Archdemon, that's true. But when we went back to the Circle after the Blight, it was ... a very empty tower, compared to before. So my experience with blood magic is particular, even for a mage."
Julius explains, and Ness is silent, attentive, allowing him to recount his experience without interruption or distraction. She tries to put herself in that position, imagines leaving Candlekeep to fight in a war only to return and find many of the people she'd known her whole life dead, or traitors and then dead.
It's not so unfamiliar a story, really.
"Thank you, Seneschal. For trusting me with that story."
For a second, it seems that Ness might leave it there, finish excusing herself from his office and return to her own. The silence that follows rests, considering.
"Five years ago, practicioners of evil magics attacked my home," she says eventually, a far-away look in her eyes. "They had infiltrated the ranks of our monks and installed themselves in positions of power, and we were not prepared for their betrayal. My mentor died in that attack. Many of the monks and scribes I'd known my whole life died. Our Keeper... "
She takes a shaky breath, and refocuses. This is, in the short scheme of her life so far, an old wound. The ripples of these losses can't even reach her here.
"There are some forms of magic I cannot abide, as a result. I'm only fortunate that they don't exist here. So, Sir, all this to say... I understand, and I'm sorry to have put you in this position. "
"I'm sorry that you've the occasion to understand so personally. And about your mentor."
He has a brief pang as he realizes how long it's been since he's thought about Irving; how little idea he has where the man is, or even if he's still alive. He's not sure he'd describe Irving as a mentor, but there was a time when his good opinion had been central to Julius's life all the same.
"You have given me no reason, on your own merits, to distrust you. Quite the contrary. I've no wish to avoid you, I only thought you should know why I might flinch away from this in particular. What I see that isn't you. But I hope you will say, if you feel I am treating you unfairly. My experiences don't excuse an overreaction in the present."
"It would not be an overreaction. But you haven't been unfair."
There's not much else to say after that, really. Or, there might be, if Julius weren't clearly in need of time to right himself in the face of this unwelcome reminder of a time past, or if Ness were more willing to assert herself in the face of someone else's discomfort. Things being the way they are, though, she only hesitates for another moment before giving a respectful bow of her head.
"I will see you in tomorrow's meeting, Seneschal. Thank you for your time."
With that, she quits his office to return to her room and analyze the conversation over and over on a continual loop.
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no subject
"I've.. heard of it, yes," brow furrowed as she tries to think of just where she's heard of Kinloch Holdβshe's read so many history books, the events and names start to blur together if she's not careful. Okay, hang on, she can figure this outβtwenty years ago makes it...
"During the Fifth Blight, if I'm not mistaken? The Hero of Fereldan conscripted the mages of Kinloch Hold to help fight the Archdemon."
That's clearly not the whole of the story here, nor what Julius is entirely referring to, but it's all that was meaningfully covered in A Study of the Fifth Blight. Recent history was less of Ness's focus at first, so she hasn't spent as much time seeking out more information on the Fifth Blight as she has the Firstβit was either more ancient history or current events, during her initial studying.
no subject
"I was there. Well. Not for Uldred's Rebellion itself; I was one of a few mages who'd been pulled out for discussions about the Blight, after Ostagar. But I saw the aftermath when we returned." He pauses, deciding on his words "Uldred had been a senior enchanter. I don't know that I need to explain the full politics of what led up to the incident, really, but Uldred attempted a coup against the Circle's leadership. He summoned a Pride demon, lost control, and was possessed by it. He then tempted or coerced some of the other mages into using blood magic or becoming abominations, or first one and then the other. Between those who succumbed to using dark magic and those who died resisting them, it was..."
He stops for a moment, glancing away. Finally, he says, "Cousland and his allies managed to stop Uldred and get the situation sufficiently controlled that Kinloch Hold was not annulled outright, though I understand it was a close thing. Those of us in shape to do so supported Cousland in the fight against the Archdemon, that's true. But when we went back to the Circle after the Blight, it was ... a very empty tower, compared to before. So my experience with blood magic is particular, even for a mage."
no subject
It's not so unfamiliar a story, really.
"Thank you, Seneschal. For trusting me with that story."
For a second, it seems that Ness might leave it there, finish excusing herself from his office and return to her own. The silence that follows rests, considering.
"Five years ago, practicioners of evil magics attacked my home," she says eventually, a far-away look in her eyes. "They had infiltrated the ranks of our monks and installed themselves in positions of power, and we were not prepared for their betrayal. My mentor died in that attack. Many of the monks and scribes I'd known my whole life died. Our Keeper... "
She takes a shaky breath, and refocuses. This is, in the short scheme of her life so far, an old wound. The ripples of these losses can't even reach her here.
"There are some forms of magic I cannot abide, as a result. I'm only fortunate that they don't exist here. So, Sir, all this to say... I understand, and I'm sorry to have put you in this position. "
no subject
He has a brief pang as he realizes how long it's been since he's thought about Irving; how little idea he has where the man is, or even if he's still alive. He's not sure he'd describe Irving as a mentor, but there was a time when his good opinion had been central to Julius's life all the same.
"You have given me no reason, on your own merits, to distrust you. Quite the contrary. I've no wish to avoid you, I only thought you should know why I might flinch away from this in particular. What I see that isn't you. But I hope you will say, if you feel I am treating you unfairly. My experiences don't excuse an overreaction in the present."
π
There's not much else to say after that, really. Or, there might be, if Julius weren't clearly in need of time to right himself in the face of this unwelcome reminder of a time past, or if Ness were more willing to assert herself in the face of someone else's discomfort. Things being the way they are, though, she only hesitates for another moment before giving a respectful bow of her head.
"I will see you in tomorrow's meeting, Seneschal. Thank you for your time."
With that, she quits his office to return to her room and analyze the conversation over and over on a continual loop.