[ Julius echoes what Commander Flint had said, and that assessment eases some of her worries. It carries just a little more weight to hear these words from Julius, though maybe that's unfair to the Commander. ]
Do you think we're important enough to this war for her to bargain with now?
[ At some point she should sip her tea, so as not to waste it. But. ]
[He takes a moment to truly consider the question.]
Yes, but we'd have a harder time proving as much now. For one thing, Riftwatch isn't the Inquisition, by design; we've taken a step further away from the Chantry, in the eyes of many of those who stayed.
[And, presumably, many in the Chantry itself.]
We have a record of doing good, yes, but also a record of being somewhat unruly in our methods. And we're presently light on Templars within our own ranks. A lot of the original negotiations centered on internal oversight options that were alternatives to the Chantry holding on to the phylacteries. We'd also just shown that they made Inquisition members vulnerable to outsiders -- not only mages, but people who happened to be standing near mages at the wrong moment. I think some of our arguments about external risk helped.
That's perfectly understandable. And I suppose there was always going to have to be a first test case, if we wanted to see whether the agreement will hold under the new Divine -- and extend out to Riftwatch, since they were technically negotiating with Inquisition mages.
I think it's something worth fighting for, but that will have to be your decision, in the end. After all, we didn't negotiate the Chantry destroying them outright; we negotiated them letting mages decide what to do with them.
[Even if, in most cases, that was "destroy it."]
If you're comfortable, I might mention the situation to Madame de Cedoux, also. She's no longer the head of Diplomacy, but she was, and she also was instrumental in the negotiations, even she wasn't present. She might have additional ideas of how best to approach this. But it's up to you; I won't say anything without your permission.
[ For his discretion. It must come easily to every mage. They keep each other's secrets. ]
I need to see this through, [ she continues, looking briefly down into her teacup. ] I've spoken to Speaker Fabria about it, and if Madame de Cedoux has advice, I'd be foolish not to hear her.
[ Even though it might all lead to nothing, or worse. Derrica isn't unaware of the risk ]
He worries about what it means to call their attention to me. [ then, clarifying— ] Because of Dairsmuid. Because I'm alive when the Chantry hadn't meant for me to be, and whether being confronted with that will force them to make some decision about the Annulment that was carried out. Whether or not it was justified.
[ This is the easiest of Ilias' concerns to share. ]
That's true, and not something to brush aside. On the other hand, that confrontation was always coming if you planned to do anything other than going into hiding the moment Corypheus is defeated. Perhaps doing it now, this way...
[He thinks, then says:]
It's still a large risk, and it's your life. But if I were in your place, I'd prefer to roll the dice on the Chantry's response now when they have both a practical reason not to want to alienate one of the forces opposing Corypheus and a calculus to make about setting off a war on yet another front. You're surrounded by other former Circle mages watching to see what the Chantry will do; you're not one mage acting on your own.
[In other words, the fact that the situation was complicated might give her some leverage she would otherwise lack. Granted, "might" could seem a bit slender when it was one's own life and liberty in play.]
[ The sentiment is touching when Julius phrases it that way, though Derrica was not unaware of it. She'd been thinking of her fellow mages and what she might bring down on their heads, but not necessarily what they might do in her service.
She ducks her head briefly, sipping her cooling tea. ]
That is kind.
[ her tone is softer around those words. ]
I'm not afraid of the risk. And if there's some benefit in knowing, I think that's worth it. But I can't pretend some part of this isn't because I hate that they have any piece of me in their possession.
[ Julius and Ilias had both been right, and so had Flint. There's value in knowing the Chantry's viewpoints, no matter the risk. But Derrica hadn't thought of that when she'd sent the letter. ]
Anders brought me mine. Before the negotiations. He'd gotten his hands on it and gave it to me. And I thought that the right thing to do would probably be to turn it over. To take my chances with everyone else, to demonstrate faith in the system.
But I didn't do that. I quietly destroyed it and never mentioned that I'd ever had it in my hands. [And he'd been calling himself a Loyalist, then.] Sometiems it truly is personal.
glacially gathers this to my bosom, mea culpa for mY slowness
[ The admission does more to settle her than anything else that's been said so far. She'd known little of Julius before this, but his understanding carries weight.
Her expression warms, even as she hesitates over her response. There's little to say. She understands. She'd have done the same. Surely he reads this in her face. ]
It's hard to have faith in them. They've done so much to show us they don't have the same trust in us.
[ Derrica hasn't trusted the Chantry in a very long time, but she knows there are others who still attempt to believe the best of them. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Do you think we're important enough to this war for her to bargain with now?
[ At some point she should sip her tea, so as not to waste it. But. ]
no subject
Yes, but we'd have a harder time proving as much now. For one thing, Riftwatch isn't the Inquisition, by design; we've taken a step further away from the Chantry, in the eyes of many of those who stayed.
[And, presumably, many in the Chantry itself.]
We have a record of doing good, yes, but also a record of being somewhat unruly in our methods. And we're presently light on Templars within our own ranks. A lot of the original negotiations centered on internal oversight options that were alternatives to the Chantry holding on to the phylacteries. We'd also just shown that they made Inquisition members vulnerable to outsiders -- not only mages, but people who happened to be standing near mages at the wrong moment. I think some of our arguments about external risk helped.
[After a moment:]
May I ask why it's on your mind, particularly?
no subject
She sips from her teacup then, letting what he said sit for a long moment before he replies. ]
I want my phylactery back.
[ Simple, direct. ]
I don't know if it still exists, but I don't want it in the Chantry's hands.
no subject
[He sits back.]
That's perfectly understandable. And I suppose there was always going to have to be a first test case, if we wanted to see whether the agreement will hold under the new Divine -- and extend out to Riftwatch, since they were technically negotiating with Inquisition mages.
I think it's something worth fighting for, but that will have to be your decision, in the end. After all, we didn't negotiate the Chantry destroying them outright; we negotiated them letting mages decide what to do with them.
[Even if, in most cases, that was "destroy it."]
If you're comfortable, I might mention the situation to Madame de Cedoux, also. She's no longer the head of Diplomacy, but she was, and she also was instrumental in the negotiations, even she wasn't present. She might have additional ideas of how best to approach this. But it's up to you; I won't say anything without your permission.
no subject
[ For his discretion. It must come easily to every mage. They keep each other's secrets. ]
I need to see this through, [ she continues, looking briefly down into her teacup. ] I've spoken to Speaker Fabria about it, and if Madame de Cedoux has advice, I'd be foolish not to hear her.
[ Even though it might all lead to nothing, or worse. Derrica isn't unaware of the risk ]
no subject
Did Speaker Fabria have anything to say, initially?
no subject
He worries about what it means to call their attention to me. [ then, clarifying— ] Because of Dairsmuid. Because I'm alive when the Chantry hadn't meant for me to be, and whether being confronted with that will force them to make some decision about the Annulment that was carried out. Whether or not it was justified.
[ This is the easiest of Ilias' concerns to share. ]
no subject
[He thinks, then says:]
It's still a large risk, and it's your life. But if I were in your place, I'd prefer to roll the dice on the Chantry's response now when they have both a practical reason not to want to alienate one of the forces opposing Corypheus and a calculus to make about setting off a war on yet another front. You're surrounded by other former Circle mages watching to see what the Chantry will do; you're not one mage acting on your own.
[In other words, the fact that the situation was complicated might give her some leverage she would otherwise lack. Granted, "might" could seem a bit slender when it was one's own life and liberty in play.]
no subject
She ducks her head briefly, sipping her cooling tea. ]
That is kind.
[ her tone is softer around those words. ]
I'm not afraid of the risk. And if there's some benefit in knowing, I think that's worth it. But I can't pretend some part of this isn't because I hate that they have any piece of me in their possession.
[ Julius and Ilias had both been right, and so had Flint. There's value in knowing the Chantry's viewpoints, no matter the risk. But Derrica hadn't thought of that when she'd sent the letter. ]
WHOOPS for sure thought I tagged this, apologies
[A pause, then he said:]
Anders brought me mine. Before the negotiations. He'd gotten his hands on it and gave it to me. And I thought that the right thing to do would probably be to turn it over. To take my chances with everyone else, to demonstrate faith in the system.
But I didn't do that. I quietly destroyed it and never mentioned that I'd ever had it in my hands. [And he'd been calling himself a Loyalist, then.] Sometiems it truly is personal.
glacially gathers this to my bosom, mea culpa for mY slowness
Her expression warms, even as she hesitates over her response. There's little to say. She understands. She'd have done the same. Surely he reads this in her face. ]
It's hard to have faith in them. They've done so much to show us they don't have the same trust in us.
[ Derrica hasn't trusted the Chantry in a very long time, but she knows there are others who still attempt to believe the best of them. ]